Reliability Is the New Sexy

Let’s just go ahead and say it loud for the people in the back: reliability is the new sexy. I know, I know—there was a time when I would’ve rolled my eyes at that kind of talk. Back in the day, I chased butterflies, confusion, and chaos disguised as passion. If a man left me wondering, questioning, overthinking—oh, honey, I called that chemistry. Now? That’s called anxiety, and no thank you.

At 47, starting over, I’m not here for emotional rollercoasters. I’ve had enough of those to last me two lifetimes. These days, what gets my heart fluttering is someone who shows up. Someone who means what they say and says what they mean. Texts back. Calls when they say they will. Doesn’t disappear into a black hole of “Sorry, I was busy.”

Let’s be real: anyone can bring flowers once. Anyone can talk a good game. But showing up consistently? That takes character. It takes someone who knows how to be present, how to prioritize, and how to make you feel like you’re not out here begging for scraps of affection. Sexy is someone who keeps their word—even when it’s boring, even when there’s no spotlight on.

You want to know what makes me melt now? Watching my man bring me a cup of coffee in the morning without being asked. Hearing him say, “I already took care of that.” Getting a text just to check on me. I don’t need fancy dinners. I need follow-through. I need steady hands. I need peace.

It’s not just romantic relationships, either. Friendships, family, coworkers—give me reliable over dramatic any day. I used to get sucked into messy dynamics, constantly trying to prove my worth to people who couldn’t even show up when it counted. Now? If I’m the only one keeping the connection alive, I let it die.

Reliable doesn’t mean boring. Reliable means safe. It means trustworthy. It means the kind of sexy that grows roots. It’s the kind of sexy that builds something that lasts—not something that burns bright and fast and leaves you standing in ashes wondering what the hell just happened.

I’m not ashamed to say that I require reliability now. It’s not a bonus feature. It’s the whole damn package. Give me calm over chaos. Give me the guy who knows how to fix a leaky faucet and doesn’t ghost me during a hard week. Give me a friend who shows up without having to be begged. Give me the quiet, everyday love that proves itself again and again—not the kind that screams loud once and disappears.

You see, when you’ve lived long enough, you start to realize that sexy isn’t six-pack abs or smooth talk. Sexy is someone who can make you laugh on a bad day, remember how you take your coffee, and still reach for your hand when life gets hard.

So here’s to making consistency cool again. Here’s to finding butterflies in steady hearts. Here’s to growing up and realizing that unsexy things like follow-through, kindness, and showing up on time are actually the hottest damn things on earth.

And if nobody else told you this today—reliable isn’t just sexy. It’s sacred. And you deserve nothing less.

Love always,

Aunty Christine 🫶🏻💜